What were you doing in 2003?

IT DOESN’T MATTER what you were doing. The Macho Man Randy Savage was recording “Be A Man,” his debut rap album. This is the world’s first Substack to chronicle each and every track of the best worst album of all time. This is the world’s first Substack to be completely finished before it’s even started. Are you ready to FEEL THE MADNESS?

Wait…it’s complete? Like, you’re not going to write 3 posts and then wait 5 weeks and then write a 4th post and be like, “Oh, sorry, y’all. I got really busy,” and then never post again?

That is correct.

Seriously?

Friend. Would I lie to you? I’ll tell you what. I’ll do you one better. THE POSTS ARE AUTOMATED. This Substack is already complete. It’s finished. I’m not even going to touch it. Do you understand? THIS HAS NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE.1

How much does this cost?

It costs you absolutely nothing. It’s free.

So then what’s the catch?

YOU GOT ME. There is a catch. But it’s a heartwarming, lovable catch. If you like what you read, or you want to support me, or you like writing and professional wrestling, you should purchase my debut novel, KAYFABE. Available soon / now from McSweeney’s. THAT’S IT.

Hit me with that tagline, Chris!

This summer, find out what happens when the greatest professional wrestler of all time becomes the world’s worst MC.

16 ESSAYS.

14 SONGS REVIEWED.

16 WEEKS.

THIS SUMMER, YOU WILL FEEL THE MADNESS. Reviewing every track of the Macho Man Randy Savage’s Debut Rap Album BE A MAN.